Friday, May 8, 2009

S'jus like Hootie says.

Wow, I got nothing today, but this is free therapy so lets see where it goes :)

I've had several people comment on what a "good person" I am... when you talk about God... you look better. Anyone that comes near Him, just looks better. My heart is so selfish and wicked. James (in the Bible) says that if you know to do something and don't do it... you have sinned. I think that's kind of cool cause that means God can put anything on any one's heart... we're not clones. Like if I told one of my kids to do a chore and not the other... then the child who disobeyed would be guilty of just that... while the other child would be guilty of nothing.

At the women's conference I went to, one of the speakers, who weighs 90 lbs. soaking wet :) said she was addicted to food and that she couldn't leave the grocery stores parking lot with out popping a brownie in her mouth. I wondered if the brownie itself would have been different in her car or in her home... but that was the voice she heard in her head so it was good that she listened... we don't want to live in self condemnation either though... that's Satan's job... let him have it. Sometimes though, if you're hungry, maybe you should eat a brownie. :)

I've shared that I've been kinda sick... and in Nov. It got really bad and just stopped eating altogether for the most part. I eat when we go out and at dinner time mostly... and not a lot at that. I cut out a lot of sugar and lost a lot of weight... which is lovely... I'm dizzy a lot, but I also learned some wicked self control. Ha! It's something I never had much of. I'm loving that... but maybe you've heard Dr. Phil say when you drop one addiction, you gain another. Hello Facebook! At least 3 times a day I go on for... a while, LOL. Being a stay at home mom for well over 20 years kept me from having a social life... that and oh yeah, the recluse issue. :) So I am really loving talking to people all through out the day.

When I was a 5 I climbed a tree and climbed too high... I fell a long way down and was hurt badly. When I was 8 we had a very high retaining wall in our yard... I fell off it... a long way... and broke my back tooth. What's the main thing you hear with every possible situation you can take on? Balance. I think when people say they have an addictive personality it just means they never learned to balance for what ever reason. Maybe someone was always holding their hand or not holding it enough... or maybe we're just hard wired that way... but some of us lack it. There are SO many things that I shouldn't go near, that you might be able to. I think everyone is unbalanced in certain areas of their life. I have known a lot of people who are SO self disciplined and do everything right! I have also noticed a lot of those people have pride issues... balance.

So say a prayer for me... send me an inbox note if you need prayer too... I would love to share in your life... that's what its all about... Have you noticed when you stumble, the first thing you do is reach out to grab something... what a great feeling when someone grabs your hand and catches you. Here I am, trying to create that Utopian society again, but hey... why don't we try it. HOLD MY HAND!

3 comments:

  1. Wonderful blog! You better be eating throughout the day, you may be dizzy because of low blood sugar levels. Healthy, small meals throughout the day. Sorry, the former trainer in me need to speak :)

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  2. I know... I cringed when I realized YOU'D read it... I know all the right dieting tips... I'm just choosing starvation.. hahaha... it's workin' for me :) (If I die, you can raise my kids... intertwines your blog issues and mine!

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