Life sure passes quickly doesn't it? I remember being 5... like it was recent. A few months ago my friends sent me some pictures from high school... those memories are like yesterday's memories. When I look on the faces of my high school friends, I have such sweet feelings about them. High school is so much like FB... maybe that's why I love FB so much. You never realize that high school is the time of your life till your out. I am one of those people who forget to appreciate moments while I am in them. Sometimes I have to step out of myself to remember to enjoy life. I get caught up.
I would love to do so many things over again! Mistakes made, words said, opportunities missed... would love to change a few things. (Is this where Disney pops in and I get hit on the head by falling debris and I am suddenly back in high school?) There are boys I wouldn't have wasted my time on, and boys I would have spent more time with. I would have loved my friends more and realized how special they were... and were going to be... instead of worrying how they felt about me. Maybe I wouldn't have been so hard on myself as well. I loved to drive by myself with the windows down and the radio on... I would have done much more of that!
I don't think in 20 years I'll look back at myself now and think... a lot of the things I think I'd think. I wish I could ask "Older Beth" what she should have done differently... but I can't. I wish I had mentors and older friends who could encourage me in the Lord, but of course... hiding away now. All I know is these kids God gave me are beautiful... I want to be a blessing to them. I could literally hold them all day long if they'd let me. God feels that way about me. My empty fixes are so sad... why don't I just run into His arms when I'm feeling lonely? He said He'd never leave me or forsake me. I do know one thing because that thing has remained steadfast throughout my life... I can't ever look back and think of a time where I didn't want/need more of Him in my life... He is a never ending fount of goodness. He is true love, the likes of which this world has never seen until Jesus came.
Whether you're high school, or old school... may you find this fount and drink deeply, drink longingly, drink continuously... you will be filled.